Ok, so this is going to be a 180 from my last post lolz!!!
I love Sheldon. How could I not love him?? I mean, for crying out loud, he is the "one"
Altho... This post may be confusing for some. And mainly, its my confession that I am not partaking in at a church...
Forgive me fellow bloggers, for I am a bitch. Upon learning that my for-the-point-of-this-exercise-"prison boyfriend" had basically signed our life away, I had many malicious thoughts. And even acted out on some. One thought was to indulge his pretty little head of the stories of "4 guys in 6 weeks", which as no one knows, happened last summer AFTER we got together. Then I realized that I am not OVERLY evil. Well, not much. So i decided to NOT tell him, much to megan's demise.... And yeah for whatever reason i am still talking to her but more on that later lolz.
So then I had this AWESOME (NOT) idea to hang with my EX-fiance. Not so bright of a move. But I was really upset with sheldon and decided i needed to clear my head and mitch was the only one who i could think of, since ben had this "girl" down for the weekend, who was tall and quiet and now he is breaking up with her after breaking her cherry but i so did not just tell ppl that, ok ben?? lol anyways... We hung out and drove around a lot. Ended up at the dog park by dads house, where some stuff happened. no sex. but still, stuff.
And the worst part was I didnt even feel guilty. Like, even now i dont, which makes no sense to me considering what happened while I was at culvers. BUT im getting ahead of myself now lol. Anyways, I hung out with him again Saturday night, and then we tried to do "it" but idk if I just wasnt into it or what, it was weird. Anywho, it was weird and akward and i didnt like it this time so it probably wont happen again...
The worst part is that for Mitch, it is all there. Sparks when we hold hands, sparks when we kiss, when we touch. Always, everytime. Just like it supposed to be like with your soul mate, which makes no sense to me. Meg says its the familirarity, but i think she smokes too much crack, or something. Why do I feel sparks for someone I have know from 11+ years, but have trouble finding it with the man that I am in love with? I hope April makes it different...
OK. SOOOO................... I got a phone call from Sheldon for Valentines Day, which I think is quite amazing. It has been one month exactly since I was out in CT, and I miss him and it. The bad thing about the call was that I had to convince him that i really do love him. Based off of the posts about "giant lies" on facebook, he thought I might leave him and he is on crack for that cuz no one can calm me like he does. So to convince him that i want to be with him forever, i said this to him:
who is ur fav gf who got a real coprate job
and who is your fav gf who got her own appartment
and who is your favorite gf who put $200 in your books
and then he wsas all YOU PUT MONEY IN MY ACCOUNT?????
and i was like, uh duh cuz i love you deeeer
and i was all, i got your letter thursday, and mailed a check to you on saturday. which means i still love you
and he was all like sappy n shit. it was awesome lol.
** i will be back later to talk more, but i need to shower!!!